A slow night in Tartarus

Frosty looked up from his writing at the bar observing his one patron, James Mattinson a hard working but slow man, slouched on the bar with a almost empty beer in one hand fast asleep. Looking to the clock across the room that looked more like a new moon shot with ice, a fact that allowed few to realize there was a clock there, he read 1AM. He gave his patron a small glance and went back to his writing as all was quiet with just the two of them.

Broken in a fractured masterpiece of understanding,
Battered by the winds inherited by the meek,
To know the brutality already served as matter of fact,
To shamble along on splintered legs of coins misfortune,
Falling to a crimson ground made by one’s own blood,
Rising despite it all,
For knowing nothing is important,
As to getting up again,
For if we do not then down we shall stay.

He smiled as he worked in the words his friend Kim Mathers had helped him realize before going on to the next.

The clouds roll in like the fog of dreams,
Cobwebs stretched and strong blanketing my mind,
The daymare of my life continues to build,
Uncaring it rolls over dreams, plots and plans,
The rolly polly of my vital imaginary self.

I sense the storm pass,
For my lightning struck eyes see and tell rainbows,
My ears groan in hearing grinding earth protesting the storm,
The scent of voids creation eludes me to everything,
Rain bloodied by the earth occludes my tongues wrath,
With butterflies and ladybugs racing through my skin,
I know the storm is past.

At once I am me yet not,
Never you or another,
My tyranny of self washed away akin to food coloring,
Not cleansed or built upon,
Simply changed while remaining me,
I’ve met death and she smiled,
So it is I died as unbefore,
To stand in existence alone with support,
No direction but my own for where I stand,
To walk nowhere or anywhere,
How does it matter?
In the choice lies all matters of heart.
Yet I have no heart for any choice.


He would always remember this as the one that broke the walls the first time just a little bit but important none the less which made him smile only to quickly forget that memory as Michael's twisted screams threatened to haunt him.

You speak of pain in knowing it,
Yet you fail to comprehend its depths,
For you only take,
Even embrace it sometimes,
But never explore it or think of it.

With ignorance you shall fall victim,
For in darkness and light,
Lie those whose brilliance tears the shield away,
Plunging into nightmares that cripple,
Perhaps even kill others on bearing alone,
Cursed in being blessed,
For in your nightmares they find comfort,
Solace akin to peace,
They are the monsters given no choice,
And should be given due understanding,
For in pain you know but the first taste,
Pray never to taste more.

That one hurt every time since he'd written it after arriving in Sacramento and of course the hurt only made him angry, never good.

The loneliness of despair attacks me as though enraged,
Wishing to be aught but the werewolf,
Beset upon by the silvered warrior,
Invincibility of normality shatters useless,
Forever it would be I rage against what I come to,
Yet the inevitable despair lashes with the whip called alone,
I crumble to my knees undefeated yet no more will,
The attacks continue and I break,
Not for them,
Cold steel with edges of jagged smiles raise me to stand,
Broken I am complete and pissed,
The pained edges of my broken soul constantly remind,
I am not alone,
I have all of me.
Yet still I hurt forever more.

Smiling he closed his patchwork journal glad he always saved that for last, for although it pained him it still gave him hope. Looking again at the clock and to James he decided it was time to send the man on his way. Pouring a glass of ice cold water over him Frosty waited for the other man to become aware and once done handed him the towel while saying, "I'll get you a cab", and walking out to hail a cabbie he knew stayed in the area as it wasn't uncommon for such occurrences at Tartarus. Upon watching the cab roll away with his semi regular Frosty went inside and locked up then making his way to find sleep with only a small stop to put down the caltrops.